Archives— May 2009

May 7—Not Your Typical Goon

I have redone the Obama sweater pattern as it was catastrophically confusing. I have at last updated the political blog (it was only done through March last time).

I apparently have not mentioned this on the site before, but I have an account on Something Awful. I lurked on there for a long time, mostly looking at either the political or humor stuff, and I finally purchased an account. The other night I was reading a hilarious thread on there where people shared their most awkward moments. I thought of the ARSE section, of course, until I realized that most of the stories made me look incredibly smooth in comparison. And then. Then I read this.

My last girlfriend was when I was 18. She was a perfect blonde, very smart, very sexy. Now that I think about it, basically a carbon copy of my mom at that age. She broke up with me because I didn't have any aspirations to go to college or get a career. I'm now 35, haven't had a proper girlfriend since and still work as a postman. I used to make fake facebook accounts of her friends and add her so I could see how she's doing (she's married and has 2 kids.. but they don't look like the father) but she cottoned onto that after a while. I don't want to do it again incase she calls the cops.

Good CHRIST.

Remind me never ever EVER to meet ANYone from Something Awful for any reason unless a friend is there with me.

I am off to Houston again this weekend for more cleaning and such at my grandfather's house. While there, I hope to watch a documentary with Kirston. Said film is called Year at Danger, made by my former audio instructor, Steve Metze, during his time in Iraq. It's as yet unreleased, which is a shame because it's very moving. I would like to hear Kirston's opinion on it.

May 28—I may not be around for a while, so here's a slew of updates.

My grandfather died Saturday evening. I suppose Memorial Day weekend was an appropriate time for the passing of a veteran. He was a lieutenant commander in the United States Navy during World War Two; the service on Friday will be a military burial. I'm not looking forward to it, but not because of why you might think. He was incredibly unpleasant, and I don't really get along with the rest of my family either. I plan on having as little to do with the process as possible. So it goes.

And so begins another chapter in my life. My dad, who now has an inheritance (albeit not a huge one), left his job at Lowe's, and we will soon be fixing up this house so we can rent it out and move to my now-late grandfather's house near Houston. I was there two weeks ago, cleaning the kitchen and then visiting Kirston. There was not enough time to watch Year at Danger, and given my own circumstances and the fact that he's getting ready to tour in the northeast, that'll have to wait till probably July. I hope to see him when I am in town at the end of the week, but it will have to be brief as we both will be busy with other things.

I don't know how much I'll be around in the coming weeks, so I've done a mass of updates to keep y'all occupied for the time being. I posted a bunch of new stuff in the ARSE section: I present to you the stories of the Writer, the LARPer, Shoe Store Manager, Jewelry Store Guy, the Clown, and Doctor Who. I also created a dictionary for the ARSE section because of the complexity of the tale of the LARPer. Apart from the Writer, the story of the LARPer was in fact the only story I wanted to tell, but I had to tell all the others for context. I'm currently having the same problem with the story of the Electrician; there are several other stories I have to tell in order to tell that one. I hope I'll have the next slew of ARSE updates within a week.