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Now into the new year of 2011, I was on better terms with the LD than I had been when we first met over a year before, and yet we still weren't truly on good terms. Our conversations were always awkward and stilted; we rarely relaxed and joked with one another. I had no idea whether it were my fault, his fault, or ours equally, but in any case, it didn't matter much since I knew it would never go anywhere. All the same, it was a bitter pill to swallow. Just as I was beginning to despair, I met the Lawyer. Again. I had met the Lawyer several times in the past, but our brief encounters never made a lasting impression, and he always forgot who I was. I eventually tracked him down on Facebook, and we started talking more regularly. I discovered that I really liked him and could talk to him easily. As opposed to the LD, the Lawyer expressed interest in and concern for me, not to mention he initiated contact. I grew increasingly interested in the Lawyer, an interest which he reciprocated, but I later found out he had a girlfriend. Worse still, he acted as though I'd flirted with him, when he was the one who'd made flirtatious remarks and broken the touch barrier, etc. How annoying. I hate guys who act like they have a good attitude toward women but really don't. Truly, I'd be less offended by an outright sleazeball; at least the sleazy guys are honest. I quit talking to the Lawyer and turned my attentions back to the LD. I was planning on moving back to Houston, and I decided that I didn't want to leave town without resolving my crush once and for all. I figured I'd wait till a few days before moving and then send him an email along the lines of "I'm moving to Houston soon. I was wondering if, before I leave town, you'd like to get together—and not for a cup of coffee, if you catch my drift. I understand if you don't answer, but I hate to leave loose ends untied." It was hideous, I knew, but at least it was short and to the point. Before I got the chance to send it, though, the LD told me he was leaving to go on tour for the next six months. By the time he returned, I'd likely be gone myself. "Oh, no!" I said when he told me the news. I was truly upset, not just saying that, though my reasons for being upset were not exactly innocent. The LD and I discussed working in other venues, the temptation of getting a "real" job as opposed to working odd hours all the time, etc. "So we're going to be at the bar on Monday or Tuesday [before I leave]," the LD told me. "I'll post it on Facebook." I said I'd look forward to it. However, a week passed, and the LD never posted the date of his leaving party online. Monday night, I began to fret. I did not want him leaving town, possibly never to see me again, without knowing how I felt about him. I decided to go for broke and emailed him. Naturally, I was a nervous wreck and got into the whiskey prior to my email, resulting in a typo. Oh well. I concluded that probably worked in my favor. To my considerable shock, he actually wrote back. Naturally, I panicked. He accepted? WTF? No! He was supposed to ignore me; I was supposed to be humiliated; I was supposed to learn a lesson. WTF. Rather more in character with what I expected, we were never able to get together as planned. Between my work schedule and his leaving schedule, we never met up. All was well with the world. On cue, almost the same day the LD left town, the Silver Fox's son seriously injured himself in a bicycle accident. I had long nursed a small crush on the Silver Fox, and in my worry for him over his son, I called him and brought him some food. I don't know about everywhere else in the world, but Southerners tend to bring food in times of distress. I started talking to the Silver Fox a bit more, and a month or so later, we got together, to my delight. I never get the guy, but I got the Silver Fox. We are still together to this day. |