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I'm no Martha Stewart—thank God—but I am a decent housekeeper. My dad raised me with "a place for everything, and everything in its place," and once I realized that wasn't just an annoying way of making me clean my room, I stuck by it. I love the way my place looks when it's neat and clean, and I love not losing things. Sometimes people pick on me for being "anal," but you know what? My house looks great, smells fresh, feels great to come home to, and I never waste time looking for lost things or being horrified by pests or sneezing at dust.
It follows that I have little tolerance for slovenliness. I can't go over to messy houses; they drive me away. Dirty spaces are depressing and uncomfortable, both literally and figuratively. I would never say anything to the residents' faces, but I do tend to make excuses, leave quickly, and not return.
I will start this section, as I did with Bad Knitting, with a page on misconceptions of housekeeping.
Misconceptions of Housekeeping
| GONK LEVELS |
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Not really that bad. They prided themselves on having a neat house but failed somewhere, they have impractical storage, or they made preventable mistakes. |
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Their idea of housekeeping is lacking, and the housekeeping lacks consistent quality. |
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In addition to the above problems, there is likely a high "sheer embarrassment" factor with this style of housekeeping. You wouldn't want to invite people to a home that looked like this, and you wouldn't want to go to someone's house that looked this bad. Likely to be called "pigsty." |
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More embarrassing than the above, even a college student would likely balk at this style of housekeeping. Messes abound, trash is left out, and there is a high likelihood of roaches, etc. They probably need a professional organizer or maid. |
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Deeply entrenched in "utterly horrifying" territory, this style of housekeeping is the worst of the worst. The five-gonk rating is not given lightly. Rather than the result of carelessness or laziness on part of the housekeeper, these messes are seemingly deliberate. It is the most contemptible kind of housekeeping, the kind in which the housekeeper genuinely believes he or she has a house that's "not that bad," complete with a list of excuses and justifications. The housekeeper(s) may have some kind of mental issue, such as compulsive hoarding, though I'll try not to pick on hoarders. |
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